What a great, yet mixed feeling I got tonight I had to go out grocery shopping, so Clint kept Abbie at home with him and Megan came with me. I headed out, and on the way, got a smile from a guy in a truck Kinda cool…ok…then get to the store, and another smile It’s a great feeling to know that others aren’t just seeing the old ‘fat-blah-whatever’ me anymore…so I was flattered…

Then I started thinking…how SHALLOW for these people to not have given me a 2nd look 50 lbs. ago, but now they are noticing me. Am I wrong for feeling that way??? I ALWAYS try to see the positive in things, that’s why, as I said, I was flattered…but just questioning the way others think I guess….I’m kinda in that ‘analyze things to death’ mood tonight I guess…LOL

So anyways, no biggie I guess, just weird and kinda annoying that someone can judge so easily…but it definitely was a great feeling to have some lookers tonight hahahahah…

I did so amazing on points today!!! Until about an hour and a half ago (about 8:30 p.m. or so) I was only at 10 points for the entire day!! LOL…My point range is 36-41 (with nursing points)…so that’s VERY little for me to have consumed for the day…I was busy though, so that always helps, plus I started chewing gum again…When I was pregnant with Megan (same when I was pg with Abbie too) I would GAG on gum…so I tried it now and I’m fine now and that seems to be helping me with not eating too So I had dinner which brought me up to 20 points, then I had a Skinny Cow, and 2 servings of Baked Lays, and 2 cups of milk…and I’m STILL going to bank 7 points for the day GO ME … hahahah…hopefully this will be a good thing for the scale again this week too I’ve avoided it since Monday, so we’ll see

Well, I’m gonna get my bootie to bed…got a long day ahead of me tomorrow Have a wonderful night, and I hope you all are doing great

I changed the music here again I get bored QUICK with the same song…the Tim McGraw one, I LOVE, but it was getting on my nerves to hear it every time I came here…LOL…so Creed is here for the moment…..*drool*…..YUMMY…… hee hee

I forgot to update you with this too….*TMI may follow!!!!*
For the FOURTH month in a ROW and ON TIME (32 day cycle….which for me is AMAZING in itself) for my Monthly Friend to visit!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I cannot even BEGIN to tell you how exciting this is for me!!!!!!!!! I might actually become a ‘normal’ woman one day!!!! hahahahaha…

I also added a new page tonight to my blog…it’s the last link below, called ‘Participation’…it’s full of the links to my daily questions that I usually have posted here (This or That Tuesday, Friday Five, etc.)…easy for you all to find, and that way constant proper credit is given to their site from here

I would like to get *mushy* for a moment and thank you ALL for all the visits, comments, tags and e-mails that I receive daily…you guys are the ones that really keep me motivated, and the POSITIVE feedback that you leave means the world to me!!! So thank you ALL from the bottom of my heart for keeping me here, and keeping me going!!!!

Well, alrighty then I have to head to bed…I get to work from home tomorrow, so I have some SERIOUS sleeping, snoring, *drooling*, and sleeping-in to do!!!! hahahaha…Have a WONDERFUL night everyone!!!!

Hmm…I missed blogging yesterday, huh? That’s unusual these days Not much to report really…now that I have hit my 50, all my excitement is all in that…LOL…things are pretty mellow around here, and not much to talk about I guess…I have been POP (perfect OP), not as much water as I should, but still getting ALOT down, and walking So, I’m staying positive and definitely hanging in there!!!

Oh…I do have two friends that are starting Weight Watchers again too!!! I’m so excited for them and wish them the best on their own journeys!!! Please visit Jenn and Jana and wish them the best of luck!!! Jana started today, and Jenn starts tomorrow!!!! GOOD LUCK YOU TWO!!! LOVE YA’S!!!

Here’s today’s Weigh-In Wednesday
Since I made up the questions, guess I better get mine up, huh?? LOL…

1. What’s the dumbest way you have ever tried to lose weight? Please explain, and what the results were. Definitely my dumbest was taking Syrup of Ipecac (ya know the stuff you give to kids to make them vomit if they ingest any poison??) to make myself vomit I got so fed up with not being able to lose a pound, no matter what I did, that I started taking that stuff and ended up getting myself into an eating disorder for quite some time…wasn’t fun
2. Red Light Foods: Do you have a specific food(s) which you have difficulty controlling eating it, to the point where you have to eliminate it completely? I don’t have any foods that I have had to eliminate ‘completely’, but Ice cream doesn’t get to live in my house very often…I’m WAY too friendly with the stuff…LOL
3. What are you top 5 “staple” foods that you keep around at all times that help you stay on your program? Low-calorie bread, Baked Lays, Fat Free Mayo, Splenda, Special K Red Berries…all of these items can be found in my house, just about at any time…they keep me going, and save me points everyday

Here is todays

1. Soup or salad? Salad…dressing ‘on the side, please’
2. Hot or cold sandwiches? Cold
3. White or whole wheat bread (or rye, etc)? Wheat
4. Pack a lunch for work/school, or buy it? Pack it…cheaper and healthier
5. If you eat out…fast-food chain, or mom & pop type place? usually fast food
6. Tuna or chicken salad? Chicken Salad
7. Cheese: Swiss or cheddar (or American, etc)? LOVE swiss
8. Mustard or mayo? Mayo, fat free, please
9. Sandwiches: wrap/pita pocket, or regular bread/roll? I love wraps and croissants, but I’m stuck with regular bread…lower in fat/calories/points
10. Sweet stuff: cookie/cake or fresh fruit? Neither…Ice cream is my thing

Here’s Todays Progress Prompts ~

Do you eat out? Once in a GREAT while…

How often? Fast food, MAYBE once every 2 or 3 weeks…and I make sure I have the points for it…restaurants, we don’t go out more than once every 3 months or longer…

Are you able to select healthy choices or are you easily overwhelmed or intimidated by the food menu? I’m not intimidated at all when I go out to eat. I go in ahead of time knowing what I can and can’t have basically. I don’t even give dessert or anything a second thought…doesn’t bother me…

What are your strategies for staying OP if you’re having a meal outside your usual parameters (at home, at work)? I’ts a little tougher when I’m at friends house, or my parents house, etc. where I can’t figure exactly what my points would be for their cooking/meals. So I have SMALL portions, and only one helping, and I make sure that I bank points the next day to be sure it’s covered, just in case….

Quick entry, heading out to work

I GOT MY 50 LBS.!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I lost 3.5 lbs. this week and I was EXACTLY 247 this morning!!!! I think I’m still in SHOCK that I actually saw that number!!!! LOL

Have a WONDERFUL day everyone! I know I will!!!! LOL

I found this at Sasoozies…thought it sounded fun Lighten my mood a bit

Unconcious Mutterings

I say .�.�.�� and you think .�.�.�� ?

Towel :: .�.�.�� shower
Ohio :: .�.�.�� Home
Coke :: .�.�.�� Glass bottle
Vacation :: .�.�.�� sunshine
Pumpkin :: .�.�.�� fall
Embarrassing :: .�.�.�� sweaty hands
Plastic :: .�.�.�� surgery
Tight :: .�.�.�� clothes
Camera :: .�.�.�� HIDE!!!
String :: .�.�.�� cat

I am about in tears right now…This is not going to be a pretty post, so please skip it if you prefer…this sounds so stupid, and I’m sorry to post this here, but this is what JUST came through in my guestbook: (I AM going to leave this in my guestbook and will NOT erase it, so everyone can see what an insensitive person you are…too bad you don’t have the courage to share your contact info with me)…

What is your name? Jenna
Do you have any comments? Why won’t you adopt a kid? There are thousands of unwanted children in this world who desperately need homes. It’s a shame some people are so fixated on having a mini me that they prefer to put themselves through the torture and enormous expense of infertility treatments rather than adopt.
I can’t even afford health insurance because it’s so expensive, and yet you think they should be forced to cover infertility treatments? Yah, let’s make the rates go even higher.

No e-mail, URL, nothing…just a snotty little note…OBVIOUSLY she didn’t read my site, because I HAVE two beautiful girls…Don’t you DARE write to me, and tell me to adopt without giving myself and my body a chance to create life. I have a DISEASE that prevented me for a LONG period of time from becoming pregnant, and having a child of my own. Before you go accusing me of JACKING UP YOUR INSURANCE RATES…you need to chill and find out more about ME and my STORY.

I DID look into adoption…when the infertility got to be too stressful, that was our intention. That was our plan from the beginning of knowing that we may NEVER be able to have a baby of our own. I never ONCE ruled out adoption. I KNOW there are plenty of kids that need good homes, and ours was wide open for one of them. Have YOU ever looked into what adoption takes??????????? It is ALOT more expensive than some infertility treatments…If I couldn’t even afford half of my infertility treatments, how in the WORLD was I going to come up with 10’s of thousands of dollars to have a beautiful child adopted into my home???

Let me ask YOU a few things ‘Jenna’…do YOU have kids of your own??? Did YOU adopt??? Don’t you DARE come here and throw stones at me for wanting to create and give birth to my own child before rushing into adoption! At the time that I found out that I WAS pregnant with my first daughter, I actually had 2 adoption seminars that myself and my husband had scheduled to go to, to get the ball rolling on it…Then I found out I was blessed with a pregnancy…

It has NOTHING to do with having a ‘mini-me’ as you so graciously put it…this is a dream that I have had since I was VERY young…my ONLY dream was to have a family of my own…not a career, not fame, not fortune…to be glowing during pregnancy, and experience the miracle of creating a life inside of me and giving birth to this precious baby…You CANNOT condemn me for those feelings…

I’m sorry that you cannot afford your insurance rates…Just remember your own cruel words if *God Forbid* something that is physically and emotionally draining on you, and is causing you NUMEROUS health problems (including potential cancer), is not covered by YOUR insurance…Then you can EAT these words…

For those of you that know me, you KNOW this is a touchy subject for me. Even though I have my 2 daughters now, a total of 10 YEARS (6 before Abbie and 4 more before Megan) of infertility is what I dealt with. Even though infertility is no longer a problem for me, OTHER health issues from PCOS ARE…and I will NEVER forget the pain felt during these years…and I will NEVER let anyone get away with making this out to be a “selfish, ‘mini-me-making’ incredibly-insensitive” issue…Until YOU have been in MY shoes, and know what myself, my husband AND my family went through you have NO reason to tell me that *I* am the one making things bad for YOU…