Yeah…you know…those dreaded plastic, cold, hard, NARROW lawn chairs that are only made for people with narrow ‘arses’…I HATE them…I hate going to parties and *trying* to sit in them…you just have that *feeling* that when you stand up, the sucker is gonna STILL be stuck to your butt…some of you HAVE to know what I mean…even if you don’t, please tell me you do, so I don’t feel so bad…

Anywho…went to a party Friday night, where, I might add, I got LOTS of compliments from family I haven’t seen since mid-summer…well, I went and sat by the fire with Megan because she was tired and my arms were killing me from holding her…so I figured, I will suffer through the humiliation of getting up and pulling the chair off my butt…well, sat with her by the fire for awhile, and when I got up to head back to the group by the garage, I stood up, and was CHAIRLESS!!! …I never even realized when I had sat down to begin with, my hips never touched EITHER side arm rests!!! I was FLOORED…I don’t even REMEMBER the last time I sat in a lawn chair, and for that reason, and now, the fear is OUTTA HERE!!! It was an AWESOME moment…you know, the ones that might sound SO stupid, but you never forget em

I have also come to realize that I got fat to learn a lesson I think *someone* was making me learn a lesson with all I have suffered through with my weight. I was a VERY skinny child, teenager, etc. NEVER had to watch what I ate, blah blah blah…I’m sure you’ve heard that before…But I was also one of *those people* who CONSTANTLY complained that I was too fat. And, I seriously DID believe I was too fat…I NEVER wore bathing suits around friend, never swam at the beach (well, not to mention my fear of water, but I still never even wore a bathing suit to lay out at the beach)…I felt HUGE…So, I think I was taught a lesson…to APPRECIATE my body….no matter how big I once was…I will NEVER be that way again, and I will APPRECIATE every step of becoming and STAYING thin

I know that I will NOT look in the mirror when I am at goal, and not know how far I came to get there, and appreciate every inch of my body…stretch marks and all I can feel already that I love ME

RANDOM THOUGHT: I saw this on the back of a low-rider pick up truck today, with a *punk* kid driving….Too Low for a Fat Hoe! How pathetic is that…so of course I was all uncomfortable wondering if he spotted the ‘fat girl’ behind him, to which his
stupid decal referred to…

Ok…so I’m not 100% loving ME *yet*…but I’m getting there!!! hahahah

We went to Dick’s sporting goods store tonight because they have tree stands on sale and clint wanted one for hunting…anyways, I was bored in camo-land and walked around the REGULAR-SIZED ladies clothing…I found a really cute light pair of black workout pants…not nylon, just very soft light weight…they are an XL…I held them up to me to see if they would even be long enough…I’m 6 foot tall and have a HECK of a time just finding something LONG enough, let along HUGE enough for my used-to-be-big self! LOL…anyways…I held them up to me, LONG ENOUGH…so I figured, I’m getting them (they were on sale for $9.00) and if they don’t fit (as I expected to need at LEAST a XXL) I figured they would soon!! Well, I got home slid the suckers right on!!!!! a REGULAR XL!!!!!!!! I’m SOOO excited!!!!!!!!! The one pair that I do have that are like nylon wind breaker style are a XXXL hahaha…needless to say they are huge and I have to tie the waist to wear them, but they are the lightest pair of pants I have for weigh ins and they are my favorite for walking and exercising…so now I have some SMALL pants that fit PERFECT HEE HEE

Just weird how we still see ourselves as our ‘old’ selves and don’t give our bodies credit for the changes it’s gone through…I still thought I would definitely need something so much bigger…I even felt comfortable walking around the regular sized area tonight…usually I wait for some sirens and flashing lights because the ‘big girl’ is in the ‘little girl’ section!!! ROFL …had to share…I’m all chatty tonight and now this just made my day!!!!!!!!

First, for those of you who check my main weight loss site…my weigh-in chart is incorrect…I have 249.4 as my current weight and it’s actually 239.4 Nice huH??? LOL…I don’t know how I missed it, but thanks Jana for letting me know

Now…the stinkin’ M&M’s…they are in one of those little machines like you see at the grocery store, only there toys come out…you stick in a quarter and you get a handful of M&M’s…Peanut ones…the groovy shell ones…yeah…WELL…people in the plant were on lunch and I won’t go out there to get any while they are on lunch…yeah, I’m a closet eater…hate when people see me eat…so I had like a ‘nicotine fit’ sort of fit…LOL…and downed 4 glasses of water (40 oz. total) while waiting for their lunch time to be over…and guess what???

I DON’T WANT EM ANYMORE!!!

hahahaha…that really sucked how bad I wanted them…stupid teeny dumb M&M’s and I almost blew it…but I was good and I’m SO happy that they don’t sound good at all now I would have sat here mindlessly munching on them and probably not have enjoyed ONE of them!!!

Last week I lost 2.8 and this week I’m down ANOTHER 2.8 !!!! I’m so excited…just under 6 lbs in 2 weeks.. I hit my *mini* goal of being in the 230’s this week, and even though I *squeaked* in, I’M THERE I’m so excited…and you will probably hear this EVERY week from here on out, but I can’t BELIEVE how low the numbers are getting…I don’t REMEMBER seeing 230’s on the scale even when the scale was going up…had to be there sometime right??? I think I unconciously blocked all that size out or something…cuz like I said before, I don’t remember anything after being at 220 before we got married, and then at 256 when I got pregnant with both my girls…so this ‘in between’ weight is a blur, and I’m SOOOO happy that I’m actually SUCCEEDING so steadily now and going down down down!!!!!

I will tell you that I did not miss ONE day of exercise last week except for Sunday…I walked at LEAST 2 miles EVERY day at a 4.0 mph pace, and on Tuesday did weights (as I did tonight also)…today I walked 2 miles around 9:30 a.m. and then again after the meeting I did just over 2 more miles…so 4 miles today for this here bod-ay

I also had a few days where I didn’t reach my target points for the day…there were probably 3 days where I was 2-4 points under. I also didn’t touch my flex points…and I have been AWESOME on drinking water…I’m going to do the same this coming week and see if the losses stay as steady My appetite seems to be dwindling…I’m not ravenous all the time, and I catch myself thinking before grabbing my next meal (usually already made) and asking myself ‘is my stomach growling???’ - ‘am I REALLY hungry’??? and I’ll grab some water and will wait for a couple more hours, then eat…so it’s kinda cool…I have lost the ‘habit’ of grabbing something and muching/nibbling all day on things that I don’t even need…it was a HABIT…

Gum has been a big saver…it’s like when I quit smoking 7 years ago…I had suckers all the time…something with the habit of holding something and having it to my mouth as you would a cigarette…I quit easily…gum is the same for me…if I’m chewing, I’m not thinking ‘I need something to chew’…and it makes it so much easier to hold out between meals…

I just re-took my measurements!!! August 26th was the last time I took them, and at that time I was down 21.25 WELL, tonight I took them again and I’m down another 7 INCHES!!!!! YES!!!!!! 28.25 TOTAL!!!!! I’m so stinking excited!!!!! Well, except 3.5 of it is in my BOOBS I so a’cited…I can’t stop smiiiilin

I went today and had my hair cut and colored and when I went to write my check, I took out my driver’s license (from September 2001) and gave it to the guy that did my hair and he goes ‘No WAY is that you!!!’….hahaha…so I thought about it on the way home, and even though I hate my driver’s license picture I thought I would post a comparison picture from that picture and one taken today The second one is from around the same time in 2001 before I started WW for the first time that year.

My dear ‘monthly friend’ that is…kinda weird…I had NO symptoms of it coming on this month…usually I have ONE day where I want to rip everyone’s face off…and one day of HUNGER HUNGER HUNGER…this month…NOTHING…and today…she’s here What’s even cooler is I weighed in yesterday with the 2.8 loss, and started today VERY strange!! LOL

Today I have gone a bit over with eating, but I’m starting new in the morning again, and will be on track with no problem I’m DETERMINED to lose 2.4 lbs. this next week…that will get me out of the 240’s and for the first time in forever, I will see 230’s I CAN’T WAIT!!!!!!!!

I walked 2 miles again today, will do the same tomorrow and Friday and as much as possible this weekend…I have had a question asked a few times, and I wanted to answer it here also, so you all know how I work my Flex Points…(I will also be answering e-mail SOON!!) I have gotten several e-mails asking me how I work my Flex Points…do I use them, don’t use them, use a little??? I don’t even THINK about them…I don’t use ANY. I do nothing but think “I have 28 pts. to use everyday”…that’s it…I think NOTHING about the Flex Points being there, nothing about even WANTING to use my Activity points…nothing…all I use is my daily allowed points, and that’s it You will have to see what works best for YOU though…maybe a few Flex Points, maybe none at all, maybe ALL of them…everyone’s body is different and everyone loses because of different things. Some people need more points/calories to keep their bodies metabolism strong, others need less to keep it strong…it all depends on YOUR body

A friend of mine and I were talking yesterday (*wink* Mel) and we were talking about having fears of losing weight…like will it jump out of nowhere and be all over me again, etc. I didn’t really think I had any fear of losing, but tonight I realized I really do. And all because I went into a store by myself and had a couple guys looking at me, smiling, etc. I smiled, of course, being friendly, but still, I FREAKED. I feel really good about myself now, and I know that radiates positive vibes to others. But I am scared of the attention…really weird…I remember thinking I couldn’t wait until I actually got glances and turned heads again. Now, I’m dreading it…I guess maybe it’s because I’m married and devoted…when I was skinny and turned heads before, I was single…DUH…maybe that’s why…anyways, it was a VERY weird feeling for me, and I’m really not too sure I enjoy it…